Friday, October 31, 2008

H - A - Double L - O, W - Double E - N, Spells Halloween!

(Did anyone else learn to spell Halloween from that song in elementary school? Just me? Ok..)

Ah, Halloween. How fortunate of you to have landed on a Friday this year. This means we get not one but two days to get the most mileage out of our costumes. Which is good, because Halloween is getting friggin' expensive. This leaves no money left to spend on booze once you actually get to the bars. Oh, well. It's fun.

Until last night, I had no definitive costume. My friend and I were going to as Pantone swatches, which was all sorts of brilliant, but she defected on us at the last minute. Not that many people are going to "get" it anyway, but it seems to me that it just makes sense to have more than one. My next option was a black tshirt that simply says "costume" on it, that my mother, sister, and I have passed back and forth over the past several years. That + a feather boa = sure, why not. I could go as a "copout".

But, alas. It was not meant to be! I was randomly in Target last night, on a quest for cat litter and maybe a kitty costume (yes, I know, dressing animals is so inherently wrong, and yet, I couldn't help myself...) when I ran into one of my bff's, who was completing his costume and needed assistance picking out a skirt. I quickly abandoned my random perusal of the book section and we wandered the store for costume bits. Then I decided that it was imperative that I have a "real" costume. Target was already clearancing their costumes, and needless to say, being the day before Halloween, things were pretty picked over. I did find a ladybug costume for a small dog that I thought would be quite delightful to force my kitty cat to wear. We then went to Walmart next door to find more pieces for Tyler's costume, and I was still trying to wrap my head around a quick and cheap (very important) costume for myself. There was a random bathrobe shoved on a rack and the option of being a "hockey mom" came up. (Can you picture it? A bathrobe, slippers, curlers in my hair, a badly drawn and grammatically incorrect "Hockey Moms for Palin" sign? Genius! In retrospect, I'm a little bummed that this option was passed up... Granted, everyone in the world is doing election-related costumes, but still.) We ended up going back to Target and picking up the 20's-era gangster costume. Pinstripe suit, a bit o' cleavage, a fedora, and ideally a fake machine gun, which was not to be found, BUT, somewhere in my possession I have a plastic cigarette holder from two years ago that would work just as well (tricky to find, because I've moved twice since that Halloween, but it has to be somewhere. It was too awesome to get rid of!). The costume they had left (clearance, remember!) was a men's costume, so the coat is a little gigantic (thank GOD - if it had fit, I was going to spiral into a bout of depression) but I think this can be remedied with scissors and safety pins. It was only $20 which is pretty reasonable for Halloween. I don't know. It'll be a simple and not overly original costume, I'm really kind of swaying back towards the hockey mom idea, but then I'd have to go try to track down that godawful white and pink flowered robe from Walmart and spend MORE money that I don't have... I guess I could save the mobster/gangster costume for next year... the hockey mom version is really only relevant this year... oh, the conundrum. I have mere hours to decide.

Anyway. I will keep my chronic indecision to myself, and present you with... Halloween kitteh!

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Monday, October 27, 2008

Ahh, Nostalgia

There are some things in life that never cease to be amazing. I admit that I am a pack rat, but when I was up at my dad's, wading through the piles of junk in my old bedroom, and stumbled across an old newspaper from my sophomore year at ISU... Please note that this was the fall after our "riot" the previous spring. Campus PD was on high alert. Central Iowa was rife with crime, a hotbed of dangerous activity just waiting to erupt.

This picture on the front page of our student newspaper was pretty much priceless. This provided endless ridicule from the student body for quite a while.

I present to you Exhibit A, shown below, courtesy of the Iowa State Daily, October 1st, 2004.

(Yes, that is a photo of two officers facing off against a Gatorade bottle. Just so we're clear.)

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Life Observation #475

Apparently Facebook's "highly targeted ad system" is judging me. All I ever get are singles/dating websites.

(And Barack Obama ads. Perhaps it's telling me to date Barack Obama?)

Tuesday, October 21, 2008


Because I am lazy, I've been storing up things to blog about until I actually had the energy to type. (Because it's hard, you know.) Now that I've gotten to it, I've pretty much forgotten everything I was going to say originally. Still, I thought I would issue a disclaimer that this post is going to be rather erratic* about subject matter. Ah, well, the randomness is why everyone loves me, right? Wait, no one loves me? DAMMIT. Oh well. Moving on...

*Please note I said erratic, not erotic. I would hate for there to be disappointment.

1. I reiterate the "I am lazy" of my opening sentence. I feel like such a bum. Not that I've ever been super active, at least not since high school, but my negative feelings over the weight I've gained in the last five years is circling back and making me so down that I am unmotivated to do anything. This is going to merely result in me getting even fatter and lazier (and reaching for the solace of Ben and Jerry). It's a perpetuating cycle. I need to break out of it... Blah. One of my best friends ran a marathon this past weekend. A freaking marathon.* I couldn't run a mile if I wanted to. I am going to turn into a blob with eyes and stubby appendages.

*PS - Congrats, Calee - you are officially more awesome than I can aspire to be.... ;)

2. Work, while still exhausting, feels less like it's trying to kill me. If you subtract yesterday and today. It was, well, challenging, to say the least. Frustrating and hectic are two other adequate adjectives. Granted, I won't lie, I secretly thrive on that sort of shit, so I was entirely in my element, I guess. I just don't know if I have the stamina for it in my old age. *wink* The day sapped my energy so I was rather pleasantly surprised to find I could wrap things up and leave at 5:25. I can't remember the last time I've even thought about leaving before 6. Which is fine... it's not like I have much waiting for me at home, so I don't really mind. I just rather prefer to do it when I'm not up against an insane deadline trying to keep all the pieces of a job moving that are sort of beyond my control. And we all know how I like to be in control of things. Which is one of the reasons I am happy I found this job - it was like it was meant to be. I love it. Still, though. I need to try to not overdo myself. Even my AE noticed I was looking a little bit weary this afternoon. But, well, tomorrow will be calmer, and dammit, I need to stop rambling because I have no life and so my job is my life and I could probably talk about my job for hours and hours and no one would care (or understand, for that matter. It's very complicated trying to explain exactly what it is I do.)

3. I need quarters. I am out of laundry. By laundry, I mean jeans. Which isn't a huge crisis, it just means I have to dress up every day until I remedy the situation. No biggie. I wish I had more nice dressy shirts though. Ones that don't make me look lumpy and frumpy, to be specific. (Circle back to Point 1. MUST.... START... EXERCISING....)

I want my own washer and dryer. I do not want to move. This is quite the conundrum. We'll see which desire ends up being stronger...

4. Speaking of things I want, I am wavering... I so completely very much want an iPhone. Fortunately for me, Apple is still on their contract with AT&T, which happens to suck beyond comprehension in this area, so I am less in danger of breaking down and buying one, for the very fact that it would be rendered essentially useless. Still... someday....

5. I am going to have to put away my hermit hat for a while. I swear, all of my friends that have migrated away from Iowa are now all coming back for a visit... THIS WEEK. Not that this is a bad thing, it's just.... social sensory overload. I'm double booked for Thursday but fortunately I think the timing works out - I can still grab dinner with one posse before I have to drive to Des Moines to pick up my friend from the airport. Still... along with all these people comes extra going out and about and while October is fortunate enough to contain a random third paycheck that, bugetarily is not claimed by rent or bills, still managed to dwindle rather alarmingly fast. I've got enough, and my plasma donation helps, but ack, I forgot how much money it cost to be social. Back to my dungeon....

6. Speaking of friends from out of state, I was kind of bummed that I had to postpone my previously-planned trip to Minneapolis last weekend. By previously-planned, I mean that I had expressed an intention to do so, and had had plans and friends to visit lined up, but nothing definitive. Which is just as well... after the events at the office a couple weeks ago, it is really NOT a good time to be taking time off... It's already a mess and I'm going to wait a couple weeks until things calm down and routines get reworked, and then maybe I'll go. No biggie. (Again, that third paycheck was conveniently timed, but it's ok. I'll just have to... save some... while simultaneously saving for Christmas... the last few months of the year are friggin expensive. No me gusta.) What really bums me out the most is not missing a much-needed vacation/getaway, but that I didn't get to catch up with my friends that are up there. All of them people that I am very sad about being so far away from. And, really, it isn't far... Just far enough to make it hard to get there. It's even more sad because I used to talk to them all of the time, and now it's just a casual exchange on facebook. If that much. It's not the same and it breaks my heart that all of these friendships (and not just these - a whole giant lot of them, lifewide) are dissolving into such superficiality. I'm really glad that a lot of my close friends are still in the area... but for how long? It's such a horrible feeling to be alone without someone to call when you are feeling bored or lonely - which was the sum of my ten months in Des Moines. They were all so very close and so far away at the same time... what happens when they permanently bail on the area? Christmas cards and wall posts. Not the same, at all.

Now I'm getting depressed (and even more incoherent). Blah. I guess it's time to go eat my Ramen that I finally got off my ass to make. Yum, yum. Sigh.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Rat Race Fender-Bender & Near-Oops Experiences

I seriously, seriously should not be awake right now. I've been working long hours just to keep my head above water (perhaps it wasn't such a good idea to be so zealous about volunteering for new accounts? Oh, but how paranoid I am about becoming expendable in this era of downsizing!) and while I don't feel exhausted, per se, my focus is pretty much kaput. I've almost been in two car accidents in the last two days, both of which would have been entirely my fault. My brain has streamlined itself into focusing on the main task at hand, shutting out all peripheral activity... which is not so great when you're encased in a huge chunk of metal. I'm not the world's greatest driver, but I can handle my bad-ass driving skillz pretty well.... except this week. I'm barely making it through in one piece. Fortunately Someone must be looking out for me, cause otherwise I (or, more probably, my means of transportation) would be toast. It's actually getting kind of scary how spaced out I've been once I get out of the office. I think I just need to slow the fuck down, relax, recharge, and have another go next week. I fully realize that I push myself too hard and knowing when to back off is not my strong suit. Never has been. I don't anticipate this miraculously changing overnight. Still, I'm not sure it's entirely healthy to be killing myself to be running in place. I'm not really getting anywhere, and yet, staying in place has never been so very important. Still... I'm gonna hit the fucking wall if I'm not careful. Just need to make it through one more day and then we hit the reset button and I sleep. A good sleep cures all ills....

And, as karma would so dictate, I'm putting a moratorium on bitching about all the bad drivers in this town until we're back to them nearly hitting me instead of the other way around. You know, back to normal. *wink*

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Black Thursday

I know that our professors always warned us that when the economy went bad, the creative field was the first to get hit and the last to recover. Well, we are taking it up the ass right now. It was a fucking bloodbath at work today. I, thank GOD, am still employed... but so many of my coworkers are not. They had to lay off a lot of people. It seriously felt like a good chunk of our family died. I guess that's what you get when you foster such a tight-knit working environment. They pulled us all together to tell us and you could tell (and I know we were all guilty) that everyone was looking around the room to see who wasn't there.

Now, of course, the rest of us are super paranoid about our job security, although chances are that if they didn't axe us with the mass slaughter, they probably aren't going to... but still. Out of the fucking blue. The afternoon was gloomy and depressing and we're all still reeling from it. They were very respectful of the employees they had to let go, but even so, it sucks so beyond hardcore that I'm not even sure there's an appropriate metaphor. My best work friend was one of them to go... and I know she'd been maybe kind of poking around for something else, but it's one thing to leave by choice and it's another to leave because they can't afford to keep you. It's going to be lonely and sad and I know I have no room to whine or complain because I was in the lucky group (and I think it can go without saying how beyond fucked I would have been if I hadn't been), but... it doesn't seem fair. And some of the people they let go are beyond our comprehension... not to say that not everyone is important, because everyone is a piece of the puzzle, but some people were, well, not people you would have expected to be dismissed.

At least it's almost the weekend. I don't think people are going to be functioning very well tomorrow.

Also, a big fuck you to the parking nazis who decided to start ticketing vehicles at 5pm. Seriously??? Fortunately I was on the side they hadn't gotten to yet, went fuck it, I'm going home, but still. It was like salt in our collective wound.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Ah, dreamland... You make reality so very disappointing...

I had a great dream last night. The kind where you kick back and watch a movie in your subconscious. It had drama, intrigue, romance, and a fully developed plot line.

Also, in a completely unrelated sequence, I found myself in a meet-and-greet with Barack Obama.

Tonight is going to be an extreme letdown.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Help! Help! I'm trapped in my head!

I feel oddly restless tonight. My apartment is in dire need of cleaning, I really should break the seal on that Pilates DVD I bought weeks ago, my laundry is going to be wrinkled if I leave it in the basket much longer, and it probably wouldn't kill me to shower. And yet, I'm glued to my computer chair, poking around the internet, not really doing much of anything, and I'm bored. Bored and restless. I feel like maybe I'm just sitting around, waiting for something better to happen. It's only in the evenings... during the day I'm busy and productive and I kick ass all day and I love my job and I don't even care that I can put in a 50+ hour work week without blinking. It's just when I get home... and it's like all the energy gets sucked right out of me. I'm sitting and wasting my life away one minute at a time and before I know it, I'll be old and this will be all I have. A sink full of dirty dishes and a head full of should-haves.

But, I'd rather not think on it too much. I guess I could just go to bed and sleep it all away... and tomorrow it will all be gone. I tend to be much less introspective in the mornings. ;)

Monday, October 6, 2008

Personal Successes...

I think I've discovered the personal most efficient way to wear heels. If I buy them a wee bit snug, then I can wear them without them sliding off my feet and then stepping on them and tripping like a moron. Also, since they will then inevitably rub against my toeses and make them hurt, as tempting as it is for me to kick them off and sit at my desk barefoot all day (which I may or may not have done...), it's actually better to leave them on and let my feet get a little bit sweaty. The bit o' moisture apparently keeps them from rubbing too badly.

Now, if I can learn a good way to do my hair...

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Other People's Lives: Officially More Interesting Than My Own

Le sigh.

So, if you will kindly refer back to my September 25th entry, you will be regaled with a completely adorable story pertaining to my meddling/matchmaking adventures.

Well, I have an Update. And it must be shared.

So, after Sarah heads back to Omaha, I go a really long time without hearing anything about this, which, of course, was driving me crazy with curiosity. Then, yesterday, she sends me a text message telling me that she's going to be in town today to visit him. (!) Naturally, we make plans to catch up and I am looking forward to getting the full story. She didn't really have any solid plans in place so we were just going to see how things went, she texts me around 4 or so this afternoon and it kind of sounded like perhaps we'd meet up shortly after that... I end up dozing off on my couch for a while and didn't hear from her again until about 8:30 or so (which was fine by me, I spent most of my weekend driving around Iowa and I was exhausted and desperately needed a nap), and she was getting ready to head down to Des Moines to visit one of our other friends before heading back to Nebraska, but Andrew (the boy) wanted to meet me, so we meet up at Coldstone (yum ice cream)... and O.M.G. are they freaking adorable. I was instantly greeted with thank yous, which indicates that she filled him in on the deviousness that was involved, and all was well. He insisted on buying us ice cream and since it was a perfect fall night we went outside and sat on a bench and chatted for a while. At some point, we send him away so that we could discuss him (he offered to go back inside and get us all some water, and then graciously hung back and waited for us to motion him back).

The story, as I understand it, is that a couple days after that initial phone call, they talk again, for over five hours (5 HOURS! I'm not sure an exclamation point is quite emphatic enough for this! I can't remember ever having that long of a conversation with anyone, ever, save for possibly with my freshman roommate in college, talking about ourselves and life and whatever else late into the night, but still. Not the same.) Then, I guess she didn't hear from him for a few days and was sort of freaking out (like, you know, girls do), and then he called her on her birthday (which is better than I did, oops) and I guess they've talked every night since then, four to six hours each time. How freaking ridiculously awesome is that?? I am about to burst with the giddy. Needless to say, they are official and I think we're looking at a fairly serious relationship ahead of us. Also needless to say (but I'm going to say it anyway), I am way super excited about this, especially since I had my meddling little hands all up in this. I helped! And it worked out! Not bad for my first real matchmaking attempt... :)

And, well, maybe someday it will be my turn. I'm oddly not the least bit jealous of the fact that I am still in the realm of the perpetually single, I've gotten to the point where I don't mind it, while, yes, sure, it would be nice to find somebody, but I'm getting better about not being resentful of all my friends who are all happily in relationships. It's just very likely that that's just not the path my life is going to go in, and that's fine. As long as I keep it down to one or two cats, I'll be fine. We'll have to see how life goes. As long as good things keep happening to people I care about, I'm less concerned about them happening to me. At least I get to live vicariously through them, right? Right.

But anyway. The moral of the story is: I rock.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Pet Peeve #327

Note to all bands: None of your songs are really that fantastic that you need to put them on more than one of your albums. It's kind of lame.