Let this be a lesson unto you, kids. Never run in the rain while wearing flip-flops. Only bad things can come of this. Doesn't matter how close you are to your car. If you fall down in the middle of the street, you're going to get wet anyway as you're lying in the mother-effing road, and now you have a goddamn hole in your arm. You may as well walk. You'll get an equal amount of rain on you, but there will be less blood involved. I only hope that this harrowing experience can serve as a warning to others about to make the same mistake.
PS - it's nice to know that when I was googling to find that second link (the search bar widget on this blog is USELESS, bee tee dubs), my blog is the first thing that comes up when you type in "verbal flailing." I WIN AT THE INTERNET.
PPS - Blogger doesn't recognize "googling" as a word. IRONY?
PPPS - No, seriously. I don't know what the correct usage of "irony" is. I blame Alanis.
PPPPS - Because Blogger is owned by Google, see? WHY MUST I EXPLAIN EVERYTHING TO YOU PEOPLE?
PPPPPS - Hey, remember Google+? Anyone still use that? It's like a fucking wasteland over there. Why must you fail so hard at your social medias, Google? It's depressing.
PPPPPPS - I was greeted with a new Blogger interface today. I went, SURE, WHY NOT? and clicked it and then I got scared because it was COMPLETELY DIFFERENT and I continue to be highly averse to change. I ran away faster than I did from New Twitter. RIP, Old Twitter. I hope the new interface continues to be optional. I'm such a creature of habit. I like my things JUST SO.
Anyway, what's most important here is that the Elbowversary means it is now September. Which, more importantly, means that we are in my birthday month. Expect something ridiculous and self-serving 'round here as I figure out how to celebrate. I have an inkling of an idea for a giveaway. We'll see.
You may start sending gifts at any time. Ha.